Who Are the 5 People You Spend the Most Time With? Why Your Circle Is Your Career Growth Strategy

Esther Ayorinde-Iyamu
Jun 2
3 min read

“You are the average of the five people you surround yourself with.”

It’s a phrase we’ve all heard. But how often do we really pause to evaluate it?

Are those five people helping you become the version of yourself you’re working toward?

Or are they keeping you tethered to a version of you that’s already expired?

In my career journey—from dancing on professional sports teams to working in corporate leadership and eventually building a tech platform as a first-time founder—I’ve experienced both sides of this truth. Let me walk you through three defining chapters: two where the people around me elevated me, and one where I had to face the consequences of not updating my circle fast enough.

2009 Los Angeles Clippers Spirit Dancers performing on the Court at Staples Center

The Power of Proximity: Dance and Performance

My dance roots weren’t technical. I started in musical theater, joined a local hip-hop troupe, cheered in high school, and later made my college dance team. From there, I transitioned into professional dance with NFL and eventually NBA teams.

NBA dance teams are known for their precision and technical demands. I found myself surrounded by women who danced for global superstars, toured internationally, and had years of elite training.

I was the underdog. But that year, I became the most technically sound dancer I had ever been.

Why? Because excellence is contagious.

Being immersed in that level of discipline and performance didn’t just challenge me, it transformed me. It’s proof that the right environment can elevate your skills far beyond what you thought was possible.

Executive Tables and Corporate Mentorship

The Worldwide Sales and Marketing Senior Leadership Team on stage in front of 20,000+ at Cisco's Sales Kick Off in 2018

Later in my career, I spent a full year in a chief of staff rotation supporting the Chief Revenue Officer of a Fortune 64 company. In those rooms, I was surrounded by executives or what I deemed "Business-Athletes", who had built massive global sales teams, solved high-stakes business challenges, and thought on 10-year timelines.

Their influence shifted how I operated.

I began to compartmentalize decision-making. I separated execution time from strategy time. I learned how to communicate clearly, lead without ego, and think in systems, not just tasks.

These weren’t lessons from a business book. They came from being proximate to excellence again. And once again, I rose.

The Wake-Up Call: Stepping Into Entrepreneurship

But when I pivoted into entrepreneurship, I made a critical mistake.

I didn’t rebuild my circle fast enough.

I stayed close to people who knew and loved me but didn’t understand what I was building. Their advice was filtered through the lens of security, familiarity, and corporate structure. And while well-intentioned, it wasn’t what I needed to grow as a founder.

I was trying to build something new with people who only knew the old version of me. And it showed.

I hit a wall.

Redefining My Circle for the Next Chapter

Today, I’m intentional about who I let influence me.

I’m seeking out other B2B2C tech founders who are navigating similar wins and challenges. I’m learning from people who are building marketplaces, raising capital, and scaling from zero to one.

But I’m also feeding my creative side. I’m spending time with artists, dancers, and leaders in wellness and fitness. Because that part of me matters too. And being around people who are building in inspiring ways outside of tech reminds me of what alignment really feels like.

I don't have it all figured out, but slowly but surely, I feel the shift of more clarity, courage, and alignment.